Friday, March 7


Nuns, Flying, Teleporting, Zombie and Blue

File this under Unintented Consequences of the Spirit of Vatican II:

Did Sister Bertrille lose her ability to fly after they abolished the cornette?


One time with my father while picking up some libations for a party, I was scanning the shelves at a local wine store and misread the label on the dubious substance known as Blue Nun as "Flying Nun Wine," which strikes me as the perfect trademark name should the Daughters of Charity go into matters oenophilic.

(I had a strange childhood obsession with the elaborate and colorful wine labels, including my father making a dedicated trip out to the shop with me to allow me to draw the coats of arms depicted on them in a notebook. The proprietor saw me at a distance and assumed a midget had been sent round by the competitors to write down all his prices.)


From 30 Rock:

Frank: (sounding mildly addled, as usual) Hey, Pete, d'you wanna see a comic book with pregnant zombie nuns?
Pete: I believe I would.


Incidentally, Bl. María de Agreda (who had the dubious honor of having her Mystical City of God placed on the Index, then rehabilitated; a reading of it allegedly later nearly scrambled Giacomo Casanova's brain*) is sometimes also called the Blue Nun or the Blue Lady. While she was not known for flying, she did end up miraculously teleporting to Mexico to convert indigenous tribes there, presumably racking up an enormous number of frequent flyer points with Air Loreto with her nearly 500 visits. Missionaries sent to the area years later found a bunch of practicing Catholics who had been catechized by a mysterious "Lady in Blue," who, after some digging, turned out to be our Mary, who managed this feat without even access to basic materials such as felt banners or religion workbooks with long digressions about Rachel Carson.

(Look, it's no weirder than some of the hallucigenic stuff that goes in in string theory or particle physics.)

*We will be screening They Scrambled Casanova's Brain! on HWTN's Mystical Theology Theater 3000 tomorrow at 3 AM, if you're interested.

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