Sunday, October 14
Drew: It's Newmania!
Me: So, I think when Cardinal Newman gets canonized, we should put a halo made of neon and lightbulbs around the head of that bust, very Sicilian.
Drew: (skeptically) Yeeeah, I think he'd appreciate that.
"Sacred architecture should have just a little bit of oppressiveness to make it interesting. Preferably totally fallacious oppressiveness."
Me: ...reports of a rumble between representatives of the Oxford and Brompton Oratories...
On a shop front with the subtitle, "For All Your Accordion Needs."
Drew: I will henceforth buy all my accordions from this man. Hold me to this, I'm a man of my word.
(I plan to.)
In re a holographic image of Jesus that turns into Mary if you tip it the right way...but never really works very well.
Drew:...the church of Gesù e Maria, in Rome.
Dan:I have the titular image of that church, you know.
Me: What is it? What do you mean?
Dan: The Sacred and Immaculate Heart of Jesusmaria.
Me: Hey! We could make a holographic card of Cardinal Newman that when you turn it sideways it's Father Faber!
Dan: Uuuh, I think that'd require a pretty big turn.
In re canonization candidate Claire de Castelbajac, a French twentysomething who lived a life of study and suffering before dying in 1975...
Me: So, I want to do a picture of the Servant of God Claire de Castelbajac, but there's only two photos of her online and they're not very useful. I mean, what should I show her wearing?
Dan: Yeah, it's not like she was a priest or a nun. And it was the '70s.
Drew: I'm thinking bellbottoms.
Dan: This is Paris, 1975, not Woodstock!
Drew: And lovebeads, and facepaint...
Dan: Eh, she did talk about her "worldly phase."
Me: Maybe more like Mary Tyler Moore. Yeah, she'd have dressed like Mary Tyler Moore. Maybe when they canonize her they can use the themesong as the Introit for her mass. In Latin. "Who can turn the world on with her smile..."
Drew: It is a pretty profound theological statement.
Actually, we really like Servant of God Claire here at the Shrine, and she deserves a wider audience, and appropriately tacky holy cards to spread her causus. We like to think she would have enjoyed hanging out with us, despite being a saint and all.
On a disappointing Franco-Bavarian restaurant's decor:
"It's not Bavarian."
"It's the French invasion."
"Maybe if they were invaded by French Hobbits..."
"I'm very disappointed."
Lovingly ripped-off from P.J. O'Rourke:
Drew: I didn't know you could get poultry cooked rare or medium.
Me: Yeah, then it's more like bird-flavored jello.
Me: And I think I saw Claire de Castelbajac on the train today.
Dan: She's dead. I strongly doubt that.
Drew: He could have been having a vision.
Dan: I strongly doubt that.
Me: Well, she was young, had a French accent and she was all in black. Okay?
Dan: I still seriously strongly doubt that.
Me: In fact, I think I sort of annoyed her.
On the use of magenta as a school color:
Dan: It was a different time and place...
"Hello, we've lost our waiter. Do you know where he is?"
"It's like the world's worst Rubik's cube."
Dan: There's an exhibit in the zoo called the "World of Darkness"? Should we really do this, guys?
The conversation then sidetracked onto Karl Barth. Incidentally, the World of Darkness looked very seventies, actually.
"...really disappointed, there were no vampires or werewolves..."