Wednesday, February 8

The Onion

I Am But A Vessel Through Which God Drones On Indefinitely

My seeming indifference to your flagging interest is, in truth, my Father's. For my Father rarely considerth His listeners. And the tired rhetorical devices I use and tame shaggy-dog stories I tell are my Lord's, as well.

It is He who said, "Michael, read at length from the Holy Bible's more prosaic stretches, and follow it with a lecture that shall continue until you are tired and then begin again, one that you shall deliver in a voice with no tonal modulation." And I have answered his call. Verily, I am doing the Lord's droning.

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