Thursday, August 21
"They're Using Coconuts!"
In thiiiiiis corner, Mark "The Albino Mole Rat" Shea... In the otherrrrrr, the corpse of His Grace the late Archbishop Marcel "Not Marcel Marceau that Stupid Mime Who Was Probably a Heretic Anyway" Lefevbre... Fr. Johansen has a splendid look at the major Rad-Trad smackdown going on at Mark Shea's blog concerning Theology of the Body and Greg Popcack. I don't have the strength anymore to follow it myself as it's all too depressing, but his more humorous digest of the latest round of shouting-matches sounds about right. Suffice to say, my position is thus: Lefevbre, if you mess-a with the Theology of the Body, I break-a you face, even if you're speaking in flawless Latin and surrounded by lovely clouds of incense. However, I lack the initiative or energy to throw myself against Mark's wild detractors.
I realize that not all who attack the Theo of the Body are Lefevbrists, and not all Lefevbrists necessarily dislike the Theo of the Body...but the attacks have been coming from a RadTrad quarter...so sorry if my snap judgement is given to stereotyping. Whatever the case, Fr. Johansen manages to cheer me up. An excerpt:
"Don't you eroticize the Blessed Mother! She didn't have breasts. The Lord was nursed by a bird which gave him to drink milk from a Blessed Coconut. I read about it in the visions of Grunhilde of Thuringia. I have a deep devotion to the Holy Coconut of Nazareth."
I wonder what they'd make of the Miraculous Lactation of St. Bernard? Come on, people, we're Catholics, not a bunch of body-hating Gnostics! Haven't we handled all this already? Anyway, tough crowd. I imagine they'd probably burn us at the stake over St. Flutius.
By the way, for the record, I see nothing wrong per se with being monarchist...but, come now, crowning the Duke of Orleans King of America? That nouveau-riche upstart? You want a Hapsburg in charge. Jeez. Come on, you know, Charles the Fifth, Maria Theresa, they knew their stuff...
I mean, come now, an Orleanist? You ever heard of Louis-Philippe with that idiotic umbrella--
(Sound of duct tape being placed over Matt's mouth. Assorted mumbling).
![[SMMMHDH]](http://www.mgilleland.com/music/smmmhdh.png){kind=small}
